Tragedy. Strategy. Remedy.

A tragedy of this magnitude and shame should first and foremost compel us to sigh, suspend our differing opinions and mourn. If for no other reason, we must do this to respect Osinachi Nwachukwu and the entire womenfolk. A lot of things will require time to resolve themselves.

That being said. No depth of tragedy can change the clear testimony of God\’s Word. I usually like to say that you have no right to speak to an issue that you are not privy to the unalloyed details. This is one reason why it is wrong to jump on the unchanging truth of God\’s Word as a means of subjugating the voices of the oppressed in our society.

Neither does the truth of God\’s Word need such a defence nor emphasis in the face of such a blow to our collective faith. The Word of God is so potent that its quiet authority is enough at a time like this. If we must sound an alarm with the truth, it must be with those who are presently shopping for spouses in today\’s church culture. Those are the real people to engage with the strong instructions and corrections of God\’s Word.

The mass of those in any shade of experience as this recent saga requires a better strategy than debating scriptures. Usually, such debates are effective where there is a lack of experience. May you not experience a failed marriage! AMEN. I think we should apply these scriptures to ourselves and allow them to work out a more compassionate response in us. As you may know, it is not necessarily what is said in any crisis that helps the \”victim\” to outlast it. Silence and sharing in the pain are more consoling.

But we also need a strategy! I think each one of us should take responsibility to ensure marital abuse and domestic violence are curtailed. How? Stop shooting mental-theoretical bullets of advice to those in crisis. Rather, help them to heal. Rescue the abused and help them recover. Find ways to help the abuser, if you can. The laws of our land are also needed in the equation. Yes, I know the law cannot turn a sinner into a saint but it can restrain a sinner reasonably. 

The church is understandably attacked in situations like this. This shows again that no matter the reservations society may have concerning the church, they unconsciously look up to her for direction. It is best for us to keep quiet as all discontented people justifiably attack us. This should not be a problem. It should only show us the mess we are in and convict us to be more intentional and effective with the Truth we have been committed. 

If the truth works in our lives, it will be seen; if it works in our people, it will be seen also. I do believe that we don\’t yet have a critical mass of those who are experiencing the truth, especially in marriages. Or am I wrong? The inconvenient fact before us is that marriages of Christian people are as troubled as others. To some extent, there is enough sound biblical teaching on marriage in the body of Christ, even if there is not enough in some quarters. What then is causing this pandemic of failed and troubled marriages? 

I\’m not sure I know what the cause may be. But maybe if there is more openness among \”allegedly\” successful marriages to allow their relationships to be observed and x-rayed by upcoming marriages, there might be some respite and perhaps the missing link might be found. Also, if husbands and wives in Christian marriages are constantly growing, willingly submitting themselves to the authority of older marriages that are modelling the biblical standard as well as determined to serve one another, we can hardly get to this demonic stage of abuse and violence.  If, as a people or institution, we don\’t do anything to correct, minimize or even eradicate these evils, then I must say that we haven\’t seen anything yet.